DVD Review: HUMAN NATURE (2004)

 
------Review by contributing writer Scott Baker------
    

HUMAN NATURE

Written & Directed by Vince D'Amato

  
 

 For me, horror films can be broken up into different categories. For example, there is the SCARIER-THAN-ALL-HELL category. This is what I would use to classify movies like INSIDIOUS and PARANORMAL ACTIVITY. Then, you have AWESOME-GORE films like Peter Jackson’s DEAD ALIVE. There’s also TONGUE-IN-CHEEK-AWESOMENESS such as Sam Raimi’s masterpieces like EVIL DEAD and ARMY OF DARKNESS. It’s fun trying to figure out where your favorite films fall.

   

But, unfortunately, there’s a downside to categorization as well. Why? Well, for all the movies that suck, you have to find a category for them as well. Is it LOW-BUDGET-BUT-CRAPPILY-DONE? Or is it TOO-STUPID-TO-EXIST? Categorizing the sucky films can be fun as well, but it can also be mind-numbing.

 

The subject of today’s review is just that: mind-numbingly boring. The film is titled HUMAN NATURE and it was truly an endeavor of stamina to watch. If you are not familiar with HUMAN NATURE, here is the synopsis courtesy of the DVD case:

 

Inspired by a true story, HUMAN NATURE documents the shocking life of a married man who abducts and tortures women in his garage, while keeping his wife, who longs for his attention, in the dark.

 

Ok...I know what you’re thinking. The basic premise sounds promising. I know Hayes is a huge fan of serial killer movies, and they hold a special place in my heart as well. BUT...these movies need to have substance. They need to be more than just remakes of every other serial killer flick we’ve seen. Unfortunately, HUMAN NATURE brings nothing new to the table and even lacks enough gore or suspense to keep the audience awake.

 

I understand this is a low-budget film, but the cinematography is bland and the acting is horrible. Not to mention the fact that the audio is so low that I had to crank my surround sound up just to hear what the actors were saying. But when the “action” started, the sound threatened to blow my speakers. Not sure if this is a transfer glitch from post-production to disk, but it definitely needs to be addressed.

 

Part of what irritated me so much about HUMAN NATURE is that nothing is ever really explained (or maybe it was and I just missed it because I couldn’t hear the explanation). We have a guy that kidnaps women and tortures and kills them in his garage...while his conveniently-idiotic wife stays in the house and never asks questions. Not only is this unrealistic, it’s boring as well. “Oh look...he got another girl...I wonder what he’ll do this time? Oh...guess he’s going to torture her...” (YAWN)

 

Don’t get me wrong...many of the serial killer flicks I’ve seen have been entertaining and suspenseful. But they were unique in some form or fashion. Jason (oh yeah...I’m going here, old school) was basically a sadistic kid out to revenge his mom; Freddy could enter your dreams; Jigsaw set up elaborate devices...these guys all had their own flair. Which is something you have to have to survive in the Horror genre. HUMAN NATURE lacks flair, entertainment, interest, and even sensibility.

 

For me, this film is a big fail. I would not recommend wasting your time on this one.

 
 

CLICK HERE to purchase the DVD

DVD Review: CARMILLA, THE LESBIAN VAMPIRE (2004)

If anyone watches CARMILLA: THE LESBIAN VAMPIRE and thinks that it looks familiar, you might have seen the film VAMPIRES VS. ZOMBIES. CARMILLA is the ORIGINAL UNCUT, UNRATED version of Creepy Six Films’ 2004 flick VAMPIRES VS. ZOMBIES, which was first released in the U.S. and Canada with an R-rating, and over three full minutes of gore and undead mayhem were cut from the movie. Now you can watch the film the way it was intended to be, with all the great zombie gore re-instated into this updated version. The film was written and directed by Vince D'Amato and was produced by Creepy Six Films. Here is the basic plot:

Beautiful young Jenna Fontaine falls victim to a strange vampire plague that causes all sorts of wild hallucinations. With her father, Travis, she sets out to find and eradicate the source of the vile infection, a vampire baroness names Carmilla. Their destination is Carmilla's hometown where the apocalyptic horror began, and where Jenna and Travis are to meet their mysterious friend, The General Banding together, they'll have but one opportunity to destroy Carmilla. Carmilla, however, has other plans for Jenna. On reaching the town they find themselves facing off against Catholic schoolgirl zombies, cannibals, demon nuns and the ferocious vampire locked in Travis's own trunk! All while Carmilla is slowly seducing Jenna's body and soul.

I have to admit, I wasn't putting out much hope for this film. I have watched lots of Vampire movies lately, and I was getting a little burned out on them. I was pleasantly surprised, though, when I found out very early in the film, that this is no ordinary, run of the mill Vampire flick. This flick has Vampires, but also contains a good amount of Zombies as well...and while that sounds like 2 genres that would be impossible to mix, somehow the makers of this film managed to do so in a way that doesn't seem that out of place. They actually mesh the two genres very well and make one entertaining film....one that both Vampire and Zombie films should find entertaining.

The acting in the film is good overall, although there are a few times when lines are either over-acted or just sound like they were read line for line off the script, but that is only a few times and not the norm throughout the film. The direction and pace of the film is wonderful, with hardly any slow spots and nice, quick 77 minute run time.

One thing I was really surprised about from this film was the gore level. I knew I was in for a treat when I watched the opening scene of a Zombie scrambling up the road, only to be met head on by a driver aiming right for the zombie. The result is one of the coolest Zombie deaths by car collision you will ever see. There is a lot of blood and gore in this film.....from the crawling zombie squirting blood and other bodily fluids from the rips in his flesh (stomach turning!!) to beheading and some good 'ol slicing and dicing of both Vampires and Zombies.

This is one film you will definitely want to check out!

Also noteworthy on this DVD is the inclusion of 2 short films from director Vince D'Amato, "Heads Are Gonna Roll" and "Sex & Death: 1977", of which the latter film is remarkably entertaining, even though I have to admit I don't understand what is going on in it at all! That didn't stop me from thoroughly enjoying it, though! Other special features on this DVD are are "Making of Carmilla" feature, Director and Producer Commentary, Outtakes, Photo Gallery, trailers, and a interview with star Brinke Stevens.

CLICK HERE to watch the trailer for CARMILLA

(trailer is NotSafeForWork! Contains nudity and gore galore!)

CLICK HERE to buy CARMILLA on DVD!

(click "add to cart" at the very bottom of the page)

CLICK HERE to visit the Creepy Six Films official website